Disclaimer: I’m posting as a mother of 4 and these are my own opinions thus it does not represent any organizations or individuals except myself.
Recently, I saw many news that spoke about the mental wellness and mental health of the younger generations. True that, there are many attributes that contribute to the negative well being — environmental, culture, the rise of the social media generations and the support made available.
Especially these 2 years due to the pandemic, many are facing not just the pandemic fatigue but the students felt a significant number of stress as the curriculum seems to be disrupted and it was done “nor here nor there”. And our society, sadly still focus largely on the academic.
My daughters shared that it’s hard to concentrate during the e-classes and the peer support to study together is not there. They do not know where they fall short of, teachers have been trying hard to finish the curriculum and ensure the students understand as much in this current situation (please note that they are unable to WFH like some of us and they too, are parents to their own kids.) to the best they could however kids being kids, they have this uncertainty and are unsure where their level of understanding are placed within the curriculum spectrum, within themselves.
And worst case scenario, in our context and (asian) culture, many of us do not adopt an open communication channel to share out the issues within. To make things worst, there’s a social stigma around mental wellness.
All I want to bring across is – us as parents, despite majority are brought up by the (traditional) generations, we should try our best to encourage kids to speak up in person or through private text if they felt awkward to share f2f and to assure them that it’s ok to feel stressed, to say no and to seek some professional help when required.
As parents, I just want them to know that I will be there for them and a healthy child is important than academics.
Just taking this chance to promote my second daughter’s instagram account – @andrealynndraws. Honestly I feel bad to take such a long time to create this account but I guessed the last straw was when she kept on misplacing her artpieces and also, people around will throw away her stuff on random materials (e.g. rough papers, tissue papers, etc — yes, she can draw almost anywhere) by accident.
Thus I decide to document her progression digitally and also perhaps this can help her to curate a proper portfolio when she’s older.
Honestly, No 2 has this flair and talent for drawings and arts that I do not have and being the quietest one amongst the 4, I guessed this is where her focus and attention are on.
Recently, Shar-B started to request to go out with her BFFs and being a paranoid mum, I was soooooo fearful that she met nasty people or perhaps a paedo preying on people. However as part of growing up, I knew
And there’s nothing foolproof, I taught her this “Plan X” thing which I feel it’s useful to share with the parents out here. I chanced upon this amongst a Facebook post in the past.
Plan X – To get out of an uncomfortable situation with no questions asked.
I told Shar-B if she needs to get out of an uncomfortable situation with no questions asked, all she needs was to message me a “X” and I will call her immediately. If she didn’t pick up, I will type her a series of standard answers.
Mummy: Hey Shar, where are you? I need you to come back to handle an emergency situation. Where are you now? I will come pick you in a few minutes.
And if anyone were to ask, Shar-B would have said, “I’m not sure why but my mum wants me back now.”
I guessed being a parent – the act of worrying will last me till the end of the lifetime. I will not give chance to anyone to abuse/ make use of my daughters. I do not raise them up as such.
And some, even went to the extent to commit suicide over bad grades and critics.
The conversation with the girls especially Sharanne set me thinking about the expectations from (1) Parents, (2) Childrens/ Peer Pressure and lastly (3) the Society.
From Kids’ perspective, they only see as Exams, Stress, Breakdown.
On a legit note, the girls always shared with me that the majority of their friends had super packed schedule for the week and near to 90% are focusing on academics, some took up the music schedules as parents assume that it was a form of de-stress and based on the instrument that the parents like instead of what the kids love. And the reason?
They are too young to make decision so as Parent we have the responsibility to plan out for them.
Precisely. And that’s also the point that they are young that they might not be capable enough to handle the stress and negative emotions.
So it set me thinking, what went wrong and what could we (as Parents) have done better?
I have friends who are on #TeamTuitionIsLife where Tuition plays a major big role in their lives and its everything they that do. The removal of tuition will make them “handicap” and unable to move on positively. Kids of #TeamTuitionIsLife normally have no much choices on their own and would need to obey the lesson plans crafted out by their parents, for their own good. Sounds familiar? Out of 10 friends, 8 of them fall into this category.
The remaining minority belongs to the #ChillMom where everything is possible and I belong to this category. Not even a single class of tuition/ enrichment and every weekend is just time spent with the kids.
I personally think that sometimes some kids will need enrichment to facilitate and motivate learning but don’t overdo it. Find a right balance. Keep the signs in check. Mentality is important for parents. Don’t yell and threaten on bad grades. It ain’t everything.
Kids felt more stress when parents compare as the (2) Peer Pressure is real. And just to be honest that kids are more sheltered as per compare to the kids 20-30 years ago. The latte developed grit to deal with things while kids of today need some parental grips, making them more vulnerable to critics.
I guess I focus on the different aspects – Soft Skills where I call it the EQ instead of IQ (Academics). The girls had been taught, social media skills, entrepreneurship, customer relations, product different and etc… Importantly I feel that parents need to teach kids how to manage failure or in nicer words, I call it, managing the not ideal situation. That’s why I curatedLittle Towkay Entrepreneurs Bootcamp for the kids, in order to give them a more holistic experience.
Acceptance is important. I do not have the greatest mind and will never do well in Maths in this lifetime. What I can do is to accept this weakness and hunt for my strengths. I can’t possibly force myself to be a Mathematician. Grades are not everything.
That’s why if I believed my kids can do well in Arts. The focus and the shift will be towards the SOTA direction. Afterall, who’s gonna teach the future generations the arty farty stuff if EVERYONE focus on the academics? Who’s going to teach ballet when everyone graduated as a lawyer or doctor? 😉
There’s always a Master in every profession, tio bo?
Afterall, I would rather spend the time and money spent on something that they love, so that Iwould get a positive ROI. Otherwise I’ll be waste my time and money on something that they do not even like/ love a teeny tiny bit and worst, do not learn from or make no change to one’s life.
Having 4 kiddos and to balance on that economy of scale is hard. Need to maximize the assets so I would emphasize on:
Getting them to learn something that they love.
Tell them Academics is not everything. Attitude is.
Accepting failures (and not scoring more than 85/ 100 is ok)
Enjoy their childhood. 🙂
Personally, this is what I would do and remind myself to do better than to surrender and join the #TeamTuitionIsLife.
No doubts, Society play a part too. We need more parents like this to overturn the mentality that focus strongly on grades and adapt more towards character development.
To parents out there, don’t let anything or anyone guilt trip you. The most important thing that you can provide to the kids is your time and love. 😊
Parents gonna walk the talk before a change is well-noted within the education system and system takes time.
Hit me up if you are keen in the Children Bootcamp.
Had a bad week battling the haze and inflammation thus I decide to make some desserts for the family.
Recipe: Chrysanthemum Wolfberries Jellies
Konnyaku Jelly Powder 120gm
Ready-to-drink Birdnest x 2 Bottles
Boil a pot of water (~1litre) and when the water started to boil, put in the Chrysanthemum Flowers and the Honeycomb Sugar. [I would remove the Honeycomb Sugar if I’m pouring in Birdnest as I prefer it to be less/ not too sweet.]
Let it boil for 15 minutes under low fire.
Off the fire and remove the Chrysanthemum Flowers.
Put in the Wolfberries, let it simmer down for 15 minutes.
Pour in the Konnyaku Powder, stir and mix the powder under low fire for 10 minutes.
Pour the Birdnest in. [You may skip this step if you are not a fan of birdnest.]
Off the fire and prepare the molds.
Pour the mixture into the molds and put it in the fridge.
Let it sit for 6 hours. [I actually put this into the freezer for 1 hour and then shift it to the fridge to cut short the time.]
Serve while it’s chilled. 🙂
The girls had helped me with the above and it seems fund as a bonding activity over the weekends. 🙂
Benefits of the Chrysanthemum Wolfberries Jellies:
Chrysanthemum is cooling and is used to treat respiratory issues, high blood pressure, and hyperthyroidism and was said to reduce inflammation and calm ones’ nerves. Wolfberry is high in antioxidants and in Traditional Chinese Medicine, it is good for tired eyes. Bird’s Nest boost better immunity, more energy, better sleep, good complexion, and good virility. Also, regular consumption of Bird’s Nest helps prevent colds and flus.
STEM is in trend but not all embraced the “orthodox” method of learning.
Science, Technology, Engineering & Math (STEM) classes have been widely introduced in U.S and the Western Countries where kids as young as 5 years old learned about the basic concept of STEM. However I feel that Asian parents still placed a stronger focus on the traditional academics and neglected the need for STEM despite the rising trends for Technologies and the worldwide storage for STEM talents especially in the areas of tech.
I chanced upon the article that in Singapore, the Government is adopting a proactive approach to introduce basic coding classes for the Upper Primary from Year 2020 as part of the education curriculum. It used to be optional but now compulsory. I guessed, the need to train the future industry talents to curb the manpower and talent shortage is indeed a pressing issue.
And I’m definitely a fan of anything that’s NOT academic. Learning should be fun especially when one is younger. One can afford to make more (and perhaps more expensive) mistakes and instead of being heavily pressured to chase the papers.
I kind of reminisced the days where I would figure how to “crash” my mum’s kitchen by cooking real food and having fun with my friends spending real time together instead of now, my kids favoured over Youtube “Toys Reviews”, check out what the rest are up to via Youtube or social media. Kids being kids, we should all learn by doing not just by seeing and etc.
Hopefully as the generations evolved, Governments will take a stronger approach in granting a more holistic education and it’s a good start now as I see more and more talents in the “cold” industry such as Arts, Music and Theatre Plays.
Thus I ponder, will parents be keen to explore workshops with kids at their early fundamentals years? Leave me a comment so that’s I’ll know.
I am always intrigued by the creative flair that all my makers and bakers possessed. As a fan of handmade and artisanal crafts, I will try to make it a point to practise what I pitch and create items from scratch. LOL, this is actually a throwback post where an archive was saved in the folder to ensure that I remember this recipe as this is the best that I’ve replicate thus far.
After googling through many versions of pineapple tarts, I settled down on Sonia’s recipe, the #meltinthemouth version!
The long process is hard earned and I had raves about it after a whole day of scalding myself, because I made the filling all by myself and the hardwork paid off~ Will be baking the next batch soon and I had wrote down the whole recipe. It’s super simple and nice based on the first attempt at it! 🙂
And sharing is caring. Along the way, I will share some insights as I bake.
2 x Near-to-Ripe Pineapple
250gm of Sugar (300gm if you like it sweeter)
See *** Notes below for other options.
I bought my pineapple from NTUC and this is the first time in my life that I had to hand pick a pineapple on own and being a noob, I googled on spot at NTUC on how to pick a good pineapple and finally got a near to ripe pineapple via this link. LMAO. Because NTUC don’t have Morris Pineapple for sale, I bought the whatever is available. If you have Morris Pineapple as an option. Just grab it! The taste will turn out sweeter and smoother.
Cut away the leaves. Skinned and sliced the pineapple. Retain the middle fibre because this is the essence of the whole paste.
Put the pineapple into the food processor/ blender. DO NOT ADD IN WATER.
Blend the sliced pineapple. Please do not blend until it become pineapple juice. But of a texture that it retains its pulp.
Heat up a frying pan/ wok. Pour the pineapple together with the juices in. Cooked over medium fire until majority of the juices got evaporated and dried out. Stir every now and then to avoid it getting burnt.
Add in sugar and cook over low heat until it becomes a thick paste whereby when you scoop/stir the paste, it should drop like a more solidify state instate of a watery type.
Scoop and put it aside to cool. ***Notes: You may add on to its fragrance by putting in 1 cinnamon stick and 3 clovers before you add in the sugar. But I just like to retain the pineapple fragrance thus would strongly abide by sticking to 2 of the ingredients.
It took me near to 1 hour and half to complete the paste and throughout as I need to take care of the 3 girls, I did a “lazy-way” out, that’s to simmer the pineapple pulp over big fire and once it starts to boil, lower it down to low heat”. But I will check the thing out every 2 minutes, to stir and ensure that it does not get burnt.
Patience is the key to good food.
Now for the tarts~~~
2 egg yolks
510gm of plain flour/ all purpose flour.
350gm of butter
100gm of condensed milk
Ingredients for the Egg Wash:
1 egg yolk
1 tablespoon of milk (I use fresh milk)
Preheated your oven at 200 degrees for 10 mins.
Put in the butter and condensed milk. Beat and mix it well.
Add in the egg yolk one at a time. Ensure it mix well. Beat until it combines.
Add in the flour. Mix it well until you gets a soft but not a sticky dough.
Roll the pineapple fillings into a ball shape (a size of the old 50 cents) coin.
Roll the dough into a ball shape, slightly smaller of the pineapple fillings. (Normally, people will roll the dough bigger than the filling but my family preferred to have tarts that’s full of fillings so I switch the “dimensions”.)
Flatten the dough and place the filling in the middle. Bring the edges together and press lightly to seal. Roll it in between the palm to shape it nicely into a ball.
Use a butter knife to cut some lines on the top of the pineapple balls to make the pineapple pattern.
Apply egg wash on the surface of the pineapple ball.
Place the parchment paper on the baking tray. Apply the parchment paper with eggwash.
Place the pineapple balls on the parchment paper and bake it in the preheated oven at 170 degrees for 23 mins or until it turned golden brown.
Cool completely before storage.
Ok, apparently, I will try Morris Pineapple for the next round. 🙂 And all the items I got for the above baking session is NTUC. 🙂
Sometimes I think my guts are way bigger than what my mind, body and soul can contain but I guess, at extreme times, it will be a desperate call for everything else when things get… situational.
Over the weekends, the girls went for a stay over at D’Resort to celebrate joy and (my SIL) Joyce’s birthday (no pun intended). So as every kids would asked – Is there bathtub? Is there swimming pool? Is there…
And sometimes how I wished my answer is a flat, NO. But Google being the evil babysitter answered to all of the girls’ questions.
Well done, Google. Well done, Technology.
So the next question is – Can YOU bring me to swim? Can YOU bring me to… Horrifying indeed. Sometimes these Q&As turn me off to an extend where I wanted to just stuff everyone back to my womb. I kid you not.
And it happened when, no one is free to bring them and the only person available is ME. And swimming tends to be a hazardous activity down my list of “DO NOT”(s) especially the kids are the adventurous ones. And girls being girls, I always had this constant fear that bad stuff will happened to them (Read up those molest cases and etc…)… So the first tactic that I always pulled off?
Clear Flat Rejections – Sorry, menses is here. LOL. (But having said that, the girls went to the extreme (and extra mile) to check me out and realised I lied. Damn.)
So when Tactic #1 failed and if the request is still within one’s ability, just go for it lor.
And to ensure that the guilt trip trap will be a success. The girls emphasized on their “last” swimming experience and the lack of childhood physically exhaustive activities (because I was always the safe-mama who won’t appreciate rides…)
And ta-da here we go! A mother of 4 lugging 3 toddlers plus a baby. However I was thinking if in worst case scenario of drowning, who should I save first. HAHAHA. So in order to prevent that (other than NOT bringing them to swim), I set rules.
Do not get out of my side/ sight.
Only go for the baby pools if not, one shall forfeit the chance to go swimming ever again and embrace Rule #1
If someone is close and made you un-comfy, come back to my side and tell me straight to the face (and point to that someone who made you un-comfy. Human nature to disengage from bad stuff if one can recognise…)
3 of them must stay together within close range and keep a look out for one another otherwise, there won’t be a next time, ever again. This rule facilitate bonding, keeping a lookout for one another and self awareness of the surroundings.
And I need to place the barang barang within my sight because I bought cash and phone…
And ta-da, it works until the shower part.
The girls refused to leave and Sayge was all time as she’s feeling the drain and dozed off in the pool. So I did a dare and left the girls at the pool while I went to change Sayge out and changed out of my wet attire.
The issue is how, how to shower and change with a cranky baby in the arm and the 3 girls in the pool without adult supervision.
So this is what I did.
For Sayge and Myself:
We showered together despite her cranky screams.
Dried her up, wrapped her in the towel while I took off every single piece of clothing of mine (so that it won’t get her wet).
Change her into warm clothes with me, being so bare.
Use my master hand to carry her and the other to pull up the undies, then shorts.
Did a full squat, put Sayge in between my thighs and put a world’s fastest challenge of bra wearing within milliseconds.
Repeat the same world’s fastest challenge to pull over my top.
Dump the wet clothes into a plastic bag.
Ta-da, the deed is done (with a back ache) within 5-8 mins. LOL
And from this I learnt 4 things:
Bring a dark color, one piece loose dress in near future.
Ensure the bag is a waterproof bag.
Take on Yoga during free time.
ASK SOMEONE ALONG NEXT TIME.
And where are the girls? Went to play the slides on loop basis and the Lifeguard is such a nice guy to help me oversee-ing them. The showering part for the girls is easier. I just prepare the towels, their bathing necessities and clothes, they will just do whatever it is. And the best plan is the girls can cooperate to shower with Sayge’s timing altogether, because Sharanne can help to carry Sayge but well… Independence is always better than to rely on others. ^^
And during the session, I saw a few of the mothers who just changed right outside the room because they have toddlers who need to be within their sight. And this is why, kudos to mothers. 🙂
After all, it’s all worthwhile to put smiles on the kids’ face. ^^
Gonna end this post with a picture taken by Sharanne, the self-proclaimed photographer/ future Youtuber. :X
Appreciate mothers and those who are in service line. 🙂
Found this back in my archives in the Year 2014. Please note, this was written in the Year 2014 when I am just 25 years old!
From a point of view of a young (working) mum.
Please note that this would be a lengthy post. 🙂
And this is my story…
I was pregnant with my elder girl, Sharanne when I am still doing my part-time degree over at Kaplan Singapore. I guessed I did brave through 2 semesters with her in my tummy and the best part, my last paper was just a week before my expected delivery date (August 2010). So I had her through an emergency c-section on 19 August 2010 when I am just 21 years old.
Everything from pregnancy was a trauma for me as I didn’t know what to do being a new mum and everything was like, wow, new to me. I need to get to know and pick up new things such as lingoes and terms like to latch on, burping postures and etc… Although it was “scary” in a way, I am thankful to have my mum, my extended family (in-laws) and experienced mummy friends who guided me through the days.
I remember the instance when I had to discharge from the hospital without Sharanne as she had serious jaundice issue. That moment, I teared like nobody because I am so scared to lose her and I didn’t know what the hell the Doctor is trying to tell me. But well, everything went on fine until…
At that point in time, I was still breast feeding Sharanne and my period didn’t come at all which both my Gynae and my friends told me that it’s quite normal. I didn’t pay attention to it so I live my life as per normal. My days are just like spending with Sharanne and looking out for jobs (as I had finally graduated). I was offered a position at a statutory board after a few months of hardwork but I told them, I can only start work in January 2011 as I want to spend more time with Sharanne.
I took a short celebratory trip in late 2010 to Taiwan – to celebrate my birthday, my graduation, my new role in life as a mum, my new found job. However, I felt nauseous and super unwell throughout the whole trip. Somehow or rather my instinct told me… I “might” be pregnant. And I bought a pregnancy test kit when I am during my last few days back in Taiwan. Guess what, I AM PREGNANT, AGAIN.
When I returned to Singapore, I quickly made an appointment with my Gynae. He confirmed on my pregnancy and checked that the EDD was in Early July. In other words, I am pregnant with my 2nd one… when Sharanne is roughly two months old. My Gynae told me that it’s ok and due to my age, the womb recovered quite fast and thus I am able to get pregnant within a short span.
At that point in time, I wasn’t sure if I can cope with 2 kids of such a close age gap and I heard a lot from my friends that Sharanne might not understand and might just throw a tantrum by seeking MORE attention which literally freaks me out but well, I LOVE KIDS! 🙂 And also, I was shattered because I just secured a job and now, who will employed someone who is soon to be going on maternity leave.
But to my astonishment, my potential employer still accept me despite my pregnancy as I think it’s fair for me to voice it out to them. Till date, I am really thankful for their kindness as it’s not easy to find such a good employer to start with.
Random Inserts: As I go along, I will list down various Pro(s) & Con(s). For easy references, I will highlight the Pros and Cons.
Well well, for as a start, the Pro that I have is (it works be it whether I have 2 or 3 kids):
PRO – Things can be passed down:
I was so happy when my Gynae told me that I’m expecting a girl. Because when I’m pregnant with Sharanne, I bought a lot of clothes and I didn’t know that babies outgrown the clothes, THIS fast. So I was thinking that Baby No. 2 can just hop on to whatever I bought for Sharanne as majority of the clothes were brand new and unworn. (Sharanne is a fat baby. LOL)
Another PRO would be:
I know what I will be going through.
I would stare blankly when I hear the various lingoes. I know what to expect and won’t be as fearful as per compared to my first pregnancy. I know what to expect and what’s the rough outcome…
Difficulties in Handling No 1.
As Sharanne is still a baby and by the time I was 6 month pregnancy with Andrealynn (the name of Baby No 2) when the tummy shown, I had a hard time in bathing Sharanne and carry her. I will get tired easily and hardly had the breath to play with Sharanne especially when I had started my full time job when I am just 3 months pregnant. My life then > Job, Sharanne, Visit Gynae, Rest.
Fast forward >>> I gave birth via C-sect on 8th July 2011 to Andrealynn.
That was the best moment of my life as its my first witnessing the birth of my child. Sharanne was an emergency so I had to go through full body anesthesia. But Andrealynn’s was a half body anesthesia. 🙂
I had the first tears of joy. And life is definitely beautiful with the kids.
As Sharanne was nearing a year old then. She was totally at lost with the new addition. And after a few rounds of interaction, I could say… they will the best playmates in life, forever.
My friend told me do buy a toy each representing each of them and do an exchange, like an acceptance of one another and they will be the best friends of life. I did and not sure if it did attribute to the fact of acceptance.
Well well, having 2 kids of an young age is an issue when especially Sharanne is still taking her baby steps and learning to walk.
CON – Exhaustive in terms of Mental, Physical and Psychological.
Mental – As I need to keep an eye on one another and at times I need to break Sharanne’s fall when she’s learning to walk and suddenly, Andrealynn wails. Physical – As I need to wake up at weird hours to cuddle and feed either one of them and through many intervals and at times, I need to hug/ carry and show physical affection to Sharanne to ensure her that she’s still has my attention. Psychological – If the other half is helping. Good for one. If not, one might just have depressing thoughts. So guys, always be there and help out your wives.
But on another side,
PRO – AGILITY SKILLS AND TIME MANAGEMENT = MULTI TASKING SKILLS
I get to improve on my agility skills in managing the two babies. Make it three if you consider the husband as one. And also time management made me learnt to multi task as sometimes their feeding schedules will clash and I need to feed 2 babies at 1 go if not I will get either one wailing or in worst case scenarios, 2 wailing babies. And the above two constitutes to me, being a multi tasker. I can just feed milk via bottle and coax the other one to sleep via cuddle. Trust me, this gets better when I had 3 girls.
I must say that it’s important to coach the elder one well. Because she will be the role model for her sister to follow. Afterall it’s a monkey see, monkey do kind of thing. Thus I begin to implant expectations on Sharanne and slowly she seems to be a “bossy” yet caring sister for Andrealynn and of course, Rayshirl in times to come.
1 of the PROs of having two kids is:
They won’t feel alone and there’s always a playmate. It will excel in their character development as they will understand the term: Sharing is Caring.
Best of all, when Andrealynn is 2 months old, I got the astonishing surprise… I AM PREGNANT, AGAIN, FOR THE THIRD TIME in the row. Even my Gynae was amazed with me and told me that for C-sect birth, I can only be cut up to 4 times. And the EDD was in Late June which meant it was too, roughly 11 months apart. Well, I didn’t expect it and it came as a surprise to everyone. A god’s gift always bring wonders and the best.
At that point in time, I was thinking, thank god that I had a stable job if not it will be financially taxing.
And being super seasoned with the whole process, the pregnancy and everything was a breeze. I always shared with Sharanne and Andrealynn that I am expecting another cutiepie in my tummy and getting them involved in a way of or another through the pregnancy process.
Fast forward, again >>> I had my third bundle of joy, Rayshirl through C-sect on 26 June 2012.
Rayshirl’s birth was a memorable one as I delayed my labour when Alex’s Grandma passed away on 17 June 2012. I pushed it from the initial 20th to 26th and thank god, Rayshirl is a good girl that she didn’t come out earlier.
The cutest part of Rayshirl’s birth was that before I packed up to the hospital for the delivery. Sharanne being the big sister remembered about the toy exchange which I conduct for her and Andrealynn. As I had no time to shop for any, she stuffed her favourite toy into my delivery bag and told me that it’s for the soon to be born sister and Andrealynn followed suit when she saw Sharanne doing it.
I was super touched by it because being at a young age, they can give up their toys to someone dear. And it brings me to understand that why can’t us, adults learn such simple lessons from the kids? The kids can walk the talk at this age… Why can’t we when as adults, we had greater understanding as per compared to them.
And thank god, Sharanne and Andrealynn were stunned to see Rayshirl for the first time and again, after a few rounds of interactions, they accepted each other’s presence.
PRO – Learning life lessons from the kids.
At times, certain things that they did, bring out the basic of life such as, happiness. The above shows me a lesson that being happy is not what you possess physically.
And having three kids, also meant that I am spoilt for choices and sharing will enables them to earn more choices. Such as, I can buy 3 different flavours of ice-creams and if they share the food, they will get to eat 3 different flavours instead of one. It also help in terms of balancing out the economy of scale. I guessed this will help a lot when I enrolled them for music lessons.
Another PRO would also be: There will be a mediator/ neutral stand in times of disagreement. Because when 2 kids fell out with one another, it would be the adult who will mediate between the two. But in this case, there will be one soft-hearted who will stand in to either apologize or to neutralize the tension.
However, the con might just be, financially taxing as you can now no longer buy one but need to buy three items instead. And having three it meant, split of attention. 2 kids are easily to manage as the husband and I just had to manage one respectively but now, with 3, it tends to be challenging especially when I’m bringing 3 of them out together but after awhile, I’m getting a hang of it. Oh yes, the placement child seats in the car is also a challenge. Three of them will take up the whole row of my back seat and I guess I need a MPV soon! And as parent, you need to learn to balance out the attention between the 3. Having one kid makes u focus ALL of your attention but having you… One needs to ensure that they get equal attention and minimize jealousy issues.
Another issue is that, I needs to get a bigger bag because having to pack for 3 will at times made me bring a weekend bag out. LOL. #findingexcusetoshopasalways
Things had always get better as they grew such as now as three of them can walk on their own, it’s not as physically exhaustive. On the positive note, I just need to “suffer” now but enjoy later. Talking about sufferings, another challenge is that, it’s like “end of world” when they fall sick together. It will be super duper… exhaustive in whatever ways. Burnt out is the word.
But the good thing about the young mum is that, I had energy to give the best in whatever ways and to play and run around with them. Hahaha I guess they had the hyper genes like me! 🙂
But I just want to say, be it whether you have one, two or three kids. Parenthood is a journey whereby it widen the horizons. I learnt a lot from the kids and it really opened up my mentality (to keep an open mind and accept changes and etc…) and knowing what love is, at the bigger picture. Despite whatever it is, it’s (Parenthood) not an easy journey and congrats to all, who picked this path.
And it’s not always that people are understanding towards your commitments. Friends might just walk out of your life when they don’t see your commitment to “go on a shopping trip with them” and etc… Although having kids might be seems as equivalent to having lesser time for other things/ people.
Trust me, surprises and daily life lessons will enrich one’s life fully and made one a stronger person (in every single terms such as mentality, physically and psychological) as it had enriched mine and shaped a better character development for myself thus I would like to say that having them are the best decisions I ever made thus far. 🙂
Having three young kids back home is definitely not an easy feat. With this post, I would like to thank everyone especially my mum, my grandma, my family, my extended family (in-law’s) in rendering their assistance to assist me in times of need. Also to my employer and colleagues who are understanding enough. Also to my soulmates (aka real friends) who understand my commitments. And thank you to my 3 girls who are considerably well behaved and especially to Sharanne who did her part as the Big Sister in looking after the younger ones.
And a pat on the shoulder of every parent. Cheers to Parenthood. 🙂
And to all parents, please take care of your health especially for mummies, for consecutive births, do not be stubborn and must take super extra good care as it’s tolling the body. LOL.
At 25+ years old, I’m proud to say, I am mother of three kids.
I just want to say thank you to the medical team over at Thomson Medical Centre and of course, my Gynaecologist, Dr Lawrence Ang, who’s currently located in Sembawang. 🙂
Update as of the Year 2019 – Maybe I should flip through my archives and repost those archives and do a refresh update on how to cope with 4 girls. LOL.